#slp thoughts

[esperantoauthor]

There is a very particular sort of satisfaction that an educator experiences when they are able to pull their class back from the very brink of total nuclear meltdown. Today was one of those days and I don't know why, but I want to write about it.

I have this one class that is very small, they've been in school together so long that they relate more like siblings than classmates, and they all struggle with regulating their emotions. I always say they are like dominoes; if one falls, they all fall (i.e. if one gets upset, the others will soon follow suit until all three are yelling/crying/taking a break outside/furiously sitting in the corner).

Today I walked in and was warned that one student had just returned from the Dean's office and the morning had not gone well. The second comes in late and immediately begs to use the bathroom, when he came back was begging to eat his snack (which we don't allow during this time, they can snack right after) and when he was told "no" immediately got frustrated and soon was in tears.

We managed to get him calmed down (the teacher talked to him outside) and I try to present the activity with as much enthusiasm as I can muster after the already shaky start. One, then the other, complain that this isn't what they want to do today and that we should take a vote. This happens somewhat regularly but thankfully they are pretty easy to redirect. They also get ruder and ruder, which then leads to further redirection from the adults, such as me telling my student not to call me "little girl." The teacher ends up reviewing the expectations and that I get to pick the activity for our speech group. I remind them that in the past they have complained whenever the activity is something they haven't tried before but that they nearly always end up liking it. One of them complains, "I don't like sentences!" and I reassure him that I won't ask him to read. This is a group for whom reading is incredibly, incredibly difficult.

Then...through some type of magic, when I pull up the activity the students immediately start volunteering to read. In fact, they are practically crawling over one another to read. "I want to do this sentence" "No it's my turn!" and me having to remind them to take turns and let the other one try. It was the most unexpected turnaround I've seen in quite some time. I felt so happy at the end of the lesson. The students were beaming and proud of themselves, they not only completed the activity I'd planned but they went above and beyond. It was the best reading I'd seen from either of them.

Today was a good day.

[stellar-haikyuu]

sorry if my rambling is not cohesive, but MAN i have so much to thank haikyuu for. hinata shoyo, in particular.

the first time i watched haikyuu, i remember that although i loved hinata, he gave me a lot of second-hand embarrassment (god forbid i accidentally get an authority figure's wig blown off). i loved his drive and passion, but i felt all twisty inside whenever he got humbled or criticized. i felt uncomfortable whenever he'd start rivalries with other players out of nowhere. but it was the s2 and s4 training camp arcs that made me realize why i felt that way; hinata was the embodiment of someone i was afraid to be.

it didn't help that i started haikyuu during the last month of my last semester. it was just one humbling moment after another. i made a fool of myself during a practical exam. i kept coming to my classes and exams late. i could barely study and write papers with the same energy i used to. i delayed and eventually discontinued promising projects. i just felt defeated, that i was not as gifted, smart, or competent as everyone made me out to be. i was so so close to giving up, but watching hinata's journey somehow turned me back around.

i hated being embarrassed. i hated sucking at things i thought i could/want to be good at. i hated the thought of other people saying negative things about me, whether those are rumors or factual statements. but all this made me do was run away, stay afraid, and miss out on things that could have helped me grow.

hinata though? he realizes his weaknesses, and actively finds ways to improve himself in the training arcs. every lightbulb moment and added skill is a middle finger to everyone who underestimated him. he reflects on the valid criticism that is given to him, even if it's hard to hear. he is successful because he has the right mindset that helps him through whatever life throws at him.

since i'm starting clinical internship soon, i'm so glad that hinata (and the entirety of haikyuu, really) brought back positivity into my life. even though the uncertainty terrifies me, i am so excited and grateful for all the learning opportunities i'll have. even if i make some mistakes, receive harsh criticism, or have a hard time, it is not the end for me. i won't lose my potential just like that.

anyway, i won't be playing volleyball anytime soon, but i suppose this is my "little giant" moment. hinata, you are so loved. thank you. <3

EDIT: hello to everyone who liked and reblogged this (or are about to), thank you for all the notes! i didn't expect this to blow up at all. hearts out to everyone who's in the same boat right now. i'm wishing you all the best! <3 also, i just attended an internship seminar about resilience, mindset, and goal-setting. i realized that hinata has what's called a growth mindset! it's worth looking up if you haven't ^-^

[leafcabbage]

i do think its funny that i thought healthcare was my calling, then hated the stuff i had to do for the cert i got so much that i turned and ran into educations arms

[paradox-insanity]

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

-inhales-

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[anaranjadanaranja]

Really out here today experiencing first hand the situation of "Are you being attacked right now or is a woman with more experience and knowledge than you being direct and specific?"

[the-qalankhais-sweetheart]

As an AuDHDer, is it bad that I want a do-over of that creepy commercial but done with our voices?

Like "hi. I'm Autism. I'm sadly very misunderstood, but I bring a new way to look at the world. I'm one of the reasons Sunny can see patterns, help children communicate. Understand how to model. Understand why they cry when they cry. Unfortunately, sometimes when I am born, I am born into a body with additional difficulties and it makes it extra hard for me. And the world in which I am consistently born into is not built for me. It doesn't try to understand, or try to respect difference. It fears all that is different, tries to crush it as if it is dissent against a status quo."

"I am Autism. I'm neither evil nor good. I'm simply different. I simply am. And simply wish to live and be loved...just as everyone around me does."

[holydramon]

how do you stop having new project ideas ughhh

[wheelie-sick]

TW: ABA therapy in detail

me n my best friend were talking about ABA and actually specifically talking about talking

did you know ABA therapists try to act as speech therapists without being speech therapists? in fact most, if not all, ABA centers do not have a speech therapist on their team!

at my ABA center they would attempt to force all the kids to use oral speech. ABA therapy is disproportionately used for higher support needs kids who are more likely to have lower speaking abilities if they have the ability at all.

many of the kids there would only speak in a few words or sentences and one was unable to speak at all. kids were denied AAC if they had any speaking ability because they wanted to "encourage speech" and thought AAC would discourage it (something disproven by studies many times). they were constantly scolded and told to "use their words" when they were upset or wanted something. they would try to teach them to talk by forcing them into it.

the one girl who was allowed AAC was the girl who had no speaking ability. she was treated like a puppy doing tricks whenever she would use her AAC device to talk. most of the time she too was denied AAC. the therapists would talk behind her back about "how smart she is to use that tablet" and "how good she is at it" all while denying it to her. they would put her in bad sensory environments without any way to communicate. as my best friend said, this was essentially torturing her.

even kids who could usually speak were scolded when losing speech. if a person who had more speaking ability shut down and lost that speech they were scolded and "lost points" (<- forgot the actual terminology used) for not "using our words."

we were expected to talk the entire time even if we were tired and wanted a break. (everyone at the center struggled with speech to some degree) I really do mean the entire time. these sessions were multiple hours long. we weren't allowed to do things silently. I don't know how much this standard was applied to the kids with less speaking ability but I imagine their experience was similar.

speaking was mandatory to access food or water. particularly those of us with more significant speech problems were expected to ask for it 2, 3 times using verbal speech if we wanted it. it was withheld if they couldn't.

speech was not just expected it was mandatory and failing meant your time in hell was longer. they did not want to focus on building effective communication (which is honestly something an SLP should be doing) they wanted to force speech. it didn't matter that this would not work for many of the kids, that being nonverbal or losing speech are not choices someone makes or something in our control. they didn't care.

reblogs okay (and encouraged)

[clownrecess]

It makes me upset that a lot of the conversation around nonspeaking and/or semispeaking people is run by fully speaking people, or speaking people who loose speech.

Neither have any right in those discussions.

I am partially referring to teachers, SLPs and other people who work with disabled people, but I am also referring to the autistic community online.

"I'm not nonspeaking/nonverbal but I think--"

"I am speaking, but I think that AAC--"

I am sorry, but I don't particularly care too much. If you are going to criticize, or gatekeep anything about AAC or being nonspeaking AS A SPEAKING PERSON, stop.

You are fully welcome to reblog from our community, or to encourage us, etc.

But you absolutely can not criticize or gatekeep anything about our community. You are not a part of this.

I have seen far to many polls lately, made by speaking people, gatekeeping parts of our community. I have also seen speaking people try to criticize, or advocate for the term "nonverbal" (if you are nonverbal, you are more than welcome to use that word! And you are valid! But if you are speaking, do not. Do not.)

Listen to us. LISTEN TO US.

We have thoughts, and opinions. Our voices matter more than anyone's when in the conversation about us.

[pixierainbows]

From NWACS ( nwacs.info )

The NWACS blog is a vital part of our AAC community. We want to take a moment to thank everyone who has contributed to the NWACS blog this year! Thank you for sharing your ideas, experiences, and knowledge with our AAC community. We love having your perspectives represented on our blog. What an amazing gift!

Are you an AAC user, parent/guardian or caregiver of an AAC user, SLP, OT, PT, teacher, educational assistant, or someone else interested in AAC? We would love to amplify your ideas, experiences, and thoughts on our blog.

Reach out to us with your questions or to let us know you are interested in contributing to the NWACS blog!

#NWACSblog #NWACS #AAC #gratitude

[Image 1 text: Thank you, blog authors!

Image 2 text: Contribute to the NWACS blog! The NWACS blog is a vital part of our community. You can help by sharing your experience, perspective, and knowledge. We want to elevate more voices! If you, or someone you know, have a unique perspective or want a platform for sharing your experience with AAC, we would love to support that effort.]

[esperantoauthor]

Called to ask a publisher a question about how to score one of my speech-language diagnostic assessments and she said it was a good question and she would need to consult with her team and get back to me.

I think I got an A being confused about a test manual which is both normal to want and possible to achieve.

[propertyofkylar]

“ok i know i say this all the time but i really do wanna write more pleaseeee send me requests i will write whatever you want (within reason)”

alright, here’s a scenario: pc is hanging out with kylar at the park, they’ve been sitting in comfortable silence for a while, kylar’s drawing smth, his eyes focused on his notebook, when he feels a sudden pressure on his shoulder. pc has dozed off and leaned their head on his shoulder.

IF NOBODY GOT ME I KNOW SLP ANON GOT ME

The only sounds in the park were the scratch of Kylar’s pencil on paper, birds chirping, and faint distant chatter.

It was one of those warm late spring days that made everything feel cozy. The two of you had been sitting for silence for some time. Kylar wasn’t sure how long it had been. But it was nice. There was something about you that felt so safe. He didn’t feel the need to fill the air with unnecessary conversation. You were there because you wanted to be near him. That thought alone made his heart swell.

He was about to turn to ask your opinion on something he wanted to add to his drawing when he felt a sudden pressure on his shoulder. Kylar froze. Ever so slowly, he turned his head to the side. Your eyes were closed, your breathing steady.

You were fast asleep.

Instantly, Kylar’s mind began racing. He felt as though his heart might beat out of his chest. What should he do? Wait, what was he thinking? He shouldn’t do anything. He shouldn’t move a muscle. You looked so peaceful. He couldn’t bear the thought of possibly waking you up.

Kylar took the opportunity to look closer at your face. You looked different when you were sleeping. The stress you carried had melted away. No furrowed brow or slight frown was present. Just a beautiful, calm face.

Warmth spread through Kylar’s chest as he stared at you. The fact that you felt safe enough around him to fall asleep on his shoulder had him giddy. The feeling made him want to get up and jump around. As it was, he was practically vibrating in his seat. But he didn’t dare move and risk waking up.

Gently, he pressed a kiss to the top of your head. The sunlight made your hair feel warm. With a smile, he rested his cheek on the top of your head. You murmured something in your sleep and shifted. Kylar was afraid you had woken up but when he whispered your name, you didn’t respond.

“I love you,” he said quietly. “I love you so, so much.”

Kylar squeezed his own eyes shut, trying to commit everything about this fleeting moment to memory. When he reopened them he flipped to a blank page in his sketchbook and quickly began to draw, hoping to capture every last detail.

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

think right now hardest thing emotionally for me is cognitive stuff.

from theoretical perspective if have any accommodation & aid & help can get. physical disability can get better wheelchair get PCA/carer n other aids. nonverbal use AAC. autism get PCA/ carer & other things to brain blurry explain but in general have no problem be visibly autistic. like all things already exist in real world. won't make self magically function like nondisabled but will get me place where. "yeah. feel like can use my full ability show my full ability full potential now." all those can think of way do stuff with modification. but cognitive. really don't know how do about it.

if can be anything want. ignoring realistic or not, abilities n stuff. want be SLP AAC specialist. work in schools help children with AAC. or PhD researcher n professor at university research AAC teach AAC n maybe also have private practice or clinic or anything work directly with AAC user children. be full time wheelchair user be nonverbal full time AAC user high support needs need carer those can stay want those stay will not feel like same person if those gone. but want cognitive things gone so bad. cant be that with cognitive things. n dont know to laugh or cry about how too cognitive issue to fully comprehend that like. it probably impossible do it with amount cognitive issues.

see friends talk about doing phd get so jealous! see people be AAC specialists work with children for better AAC access get so jealous. so unhealthily jealous.

want go back take classes so bad. but right now. not know any way make it possible other than. complete & utter fundamental alteration of like. college n classes. even with that there high doubt of if can do it. but without it it pretty much not going happen.

can’t think can’t understand can’t remember can’t memorize can’t learn. limited ability which make me upset n frustrate n struggle. which then cause resentment give mental block. n now can’t do those things even more

like how do you even accommodate these cognitive issues. had or thought about pretty much any sort of college level accommodation n none of those cut it

know have potential have so much ability n want do so many things have invaluable perspective n experience. but CANT DO IT. feel trapped. forced into jar with tight lid n can’t get out

[autisticadvocacy]

“AAC doesn’t restrict my ability to have conversations; it enhances it. That extra time forces us all to take a moment and find ourselves – and gives me the ability to be intentional in thought.”

[holydramon]

once again falling into the textile craft pit hole of being like “I need to learn how to sew right fucking now or I’ll explode”

[the-qalankhais-sweetheart]

To all my fellow AuDHD, ADHD, and Autistic mutuals and anyone out there.

If anyone tells you "you can't have sensory accommodations in the real world, you gotta suck it up buttercup," tell them that an AuDHD SLP-Intern you know was allowed to borrow the kids' sensory wiggle cushion to sit on in order to correct understimulation and be able to freaking focus enough to make progress on an assessment report. And you know what?

It worked.

The OT I work with suggested it, and I couldn't believe I never thought to ask...but it's because even I, a very out-and-proud ND who often openly stims, still has protective masking mechanisms and a tendency to self-gaslight that "I don't really need that".

Therefore, you tell them that an SLP-Intern, one of the people that is supposed to help treat communication disorders and help their fellow autistic, ADHD, and AuDHD people develop stronger communication skills and method that work for them needs sensory breaks, sensory accommodations, and written and visual directions to function.

And she may not be perfect, or the Best SLP Ever™, but no one is.

And she's highly valued by her employer.

You tell them it's doable. There's a reason for the phrase "reasonable accommodations", because plenty of them ARE. Sure, your employer may not be able to give you an extra month to turn in a report (though depending on your field and the procedures involved, perhaps they CAN - this is very field specific, of course) but they sure as shit can let you turn down lights, sit on sensory cushions and use sound filtering earplugs to do what you need to do. It's not obtrusive.

If my company can do it, other companies have no excuse.

Don't let anyone tell you common sense accommodations are a hassle, needless, or "distracting".

Your needs matter, they are valid, and they are NOT a hindrance to your employer.